How can parents help with socialising their children in DL times?

Jun 14, 2021

Even though we all had high hopes for 2021 and couldn’t wait for 2020 to be over, this term’s first day of school was not what we wanted and expected it to be. Once again, we started a new term at kitchen tables, in basements or in bedrooms, meeting our teachers and classmates on screens.

The ‘new normal’ brought the distance learning upon us and we are now facing the life in which we have to constantly be prepared to be back in front of our screens trying to support our children’s education.

But what about supporting children’s mental and emotional health? How do we manage their screen time? How do we accommodate their special education needs? How do we minimise the infection risk while still giving kids important social interactions?

One thing the parents should always remember is that children by nature are fairly resilient. Having six months to a year of distance learning is very unlikely to fundamentally change their development. Instead of worrying too much, we should all try to learn how to live in this ‘new normal’ and keep ourselves, as well as our children sane.

Here are some ways how we can do this:

Depending on risk and situations, you may choose to allow your children to socialise with children from households who follow the same safety practices as you do, and this is totally fine. You should try to create your safe ‘social bubble’ – whether this is your neighbourhood or your child’s class - and keep interaction within this bubble. Have a necessary open talk with these families beforehand. For example, you may agree in advance that if someone goes on vacation or engages in a higher risk activity, they should share that information with you. The same goes for transparency about learning someone in their family has had known exposure to someone who tested positive for COVID-19.

Another way to help your children with much needed socialisation during distance learning is to think about how you can replicate social interactions in socially distant, creative ways. You might choose to look at old pictures together to remind you of friends you haven’t connected with in some time. Ask your children to make them a card that they will give them once they are together again. Set up a virtual ‘hang out’ time and let your children talk to their friends without you. It might simply be them watching each other play, or showing each other their toys, making silly faces to make each other laugh. Set up a conference call and include many friends. Have a virtual play or dress up party.

Some of children’s most important socialisation comes from their own family, siblings and parents. Your children’s relationship and interaction with you is often ‘the secret’. Make sure you have some family time every day. It might be play time during the bath every night, or a board game that you will be playing in teams. Do puzzles together, paint, bake cookies and make smoothies. Have every possible hands-on activity that you can and do it with your children. Try to include everyone in your household and have a party of your own.

With children using screens for school and social interactions, it’s difficult to stick to usual screen time rules. Some parents may also be working from home while children are there and find that screens help keep children occupied during downtimes. This is a part of this ‘new normal’ we have to accept and adapt to. You will be worried about how much time your children spend in front of the screens, but you should remember the biggest message there is: Do not feel guilty about it! Worry less about the amount of screen time and focus more on the content your children are engaging with. Focus on positive content, such as educational videos, songs, dances, wake up-shake up videos, aerobics and yoga for younger children. Do monitor what your children watch on their devices and reduce exposure to content that may lead to aggressive or irritable behavior afterwards, such as violent video games.

Continue to encourage your children to interact with their classmates in their distance learning lessons. We all know and agree this isn’t a perfect way to engage kids with their classrooms, but we simply have to do what’s good enough right now.

If we try to look at it from the bright side, in some ways, this ‘new normal’ continues to teach us to be flexible and resilient and to embrace new things and adapt. We should tell our children that it is and it is going to be different, but we’re going to figure it out. We are all in this together and doing these things because we want to go back to our ‘old normal’ that we loved and enjoyed so much.